The 3lack 3ox.

There are many reasons why a person decides that it is better to keep silence. Dissociation is a survival mechanism .  The question, what is so dangerous about remembering and speaking out -  is hijacked by the myth of self sufficiency. We are supposed to be enough for ourselves. Distress is framed as transient and therefore unreal. We are advised to seek therapy so that we heal and can move on - it isn't our place to try to change anything outside of ourselves... Sorry, what?! So if you see someone hitting another person repeatedly you don't need to phone for the police? You don't need to do anything except take care of you? OK... Yes, I'm struggling, for there are very good reasons why just leaving this account here, pretending it isn't me, is the safest and most sensible option.  Except  when I felt my eyes brim with tears just through reading the words, logical positivism [+] . This confirms that if something isn't faced up to, I am self abandoning , ena...

[Re-written 9/10/25] My complaint is simply this. In 2024 I requested an apology and a process of resolution from a therapist and he told me to 'never contact him again'. He told me to 'let it go, as I was only hurting myself. It had taken me two years after 'therapy' for me to clarify my emotions enough to request transparency and understanding of why I had found therapy a harmful experience. I felt that the importance of how our sessions failed, went beyond me. And I needed to be sure that there would not be a repetition of a similar 'contaminated' process with another client. I also suspected that this had happened before. In September this year I sent the therapist my 'victim statement' with a request for an apology.  There is still a possibility that he might reply, but in the light of his first reply - I am doubtful. What I would like to happen? I would like the therapist to understand the concept of epistemic injustice, How his denial of open,...

Freeware was never the correct term. Yet the term freeware captures the sense of my intention. When I finally found enough courage to write to the therapist asking for some kind of resolution process (February 2024) he maintained that as he hadn't done anything unethical, there could not be a legitimate problem. He told me that I needed to 'let it go'. I said that unless there was a resolution process the whole thing would be 'freeware'. In retrospect, this is how I let it go.  Creative Commons doesn't sound as exciting as freeware. This blog is CC, not freeware exactly, but my intention is the same. It means no copyright restriction. This story can't belong to me alone...it would live and die with me, and that wont do. As I have said elsewhere: copy and paste - this is the original.  From here on, the 3lack 3ox is Kit-less. Outcome - he now stands as a symbol for any therapist who makes it impossible for their client to understand what is occurring in th...

In interactions or performances the involved parties may be audience members and performers simultaneously; the actors usually foster impressions that reflect well upon themselves and encourage the others, by various means, to accept their preferred definition. Goffman acknowledges that when the accepted definition of the situation has been discredited, some or all of the actors may pretend that nothing has changed, provided that they find this strategy profitable to themselves or wish to keep the peace. For example, when a person attending a formal dinner—and who is certainly striving to present himself or herself positively—trips, nearby party-goers may pretend not to have seen the fumble; they assist the person in maintaining face. Goffman avers that this type of artificial, willed credulity happens on every level of social organization, from top to bottom. From Wiki Nothing new under the sun!  Trust those sociologists to have kept this as their secret (I joke). The problem is I...

  OK...so I honestly do not know where to start, because I've heard someone explain exactly what happened between Kit and I, and I feel sick and relieved, sad...but all of this, my whole blog and everything I've said. I feel like I stand at the edge of a cliff and I have to climb, not let go. The sensation of metaphorically throwing myself off is about oblivion, ending all my thoughts about this, letting go and just surrendering to a great big nothing - well that scares me more than trying to climb down. Because if I did that I'd be letting others down. The lecture has brought me to the edge! So there was a lecture about 'Erotic Transfer' from a person who had done his Masters researching how therapists understand their erotic feelings for their clients. As he explained his research and findings I felt as if I was being pulled in so many different directions; laugh or cry? I cried. He explained each stage I'd noticed about Kit's 'process' to such a ...

In many ways what I'm researching feels like small beans. The edge of where I live is festooned by flags, the Facebook group connected to my town is full of people saying how great it is to see such patriotism and pride. I tell myself that The Seer of Shepperton was here before me... Ballard, not good, not bad, an observer of the ultra-madness that people call sanity. Witness to the nuclear flash that ended his time in prison camps.  In Kingdom Come , The Seer of Shepperton describes the flags... So me, this? Small beans? Well perhaps. But if I am, then so is everyone and everything else, and I can't agree to that. I've had a lot of experience of the anaesthesia wrapped aesthetic of Utopia. It is a dehumanising toxic brew that has forever been swirling through every aspect of human life. From witnessing doctors explaining why distress is a kind of automatic response, and nothing to take seriously. To being on the receiving end of a very specific kind of absence from those w...

Not sure where I'm going with this, so I will just write and see.. Someone pointed me in the direction of Kendra, a woman who posted a succession of films about falling in love with her psychiatrist. I've only watched two YouTubes about her story so far - one from an expert in AI who was commenting mostly on how the 'magic mirror' quality of LLMs can reinforce error, as Kendra took to talking to two AIs about what happened. And the other YouTube is from a Dr in Seattle.  Briefly, Kendra's story begins this way:  Kendra believes that her psychiatrist had feelings for her, and 'bread crumbed' her into staying in therapy with him for four years. So, it is vital to try to understand if boundaries have been crossed because this is a serious allegation. But what if all the usual questions about boundaries and ethical conduct fail to address the real issue that underlies the problem? What If the psychiatrist acted in the best and most ethical way and despite all go...