The 3lack 3ox.

He - "How are you"? Me - "I'm fine..." And I would say " Fine! Hey how are you"?   But I don't.  I've been told that I'm tangential, and if I talk it will be labyrinthine; long, coiling, discursive.  Tangential.   His silence, is wide open waiting.  Even though I do this silence thing myself too, I feel obliged to fill it. I go full tangential - I'm talking about episodic and autobiographical memory, and the work of Tulvig  and I know that anything like this is considered cold, and CBT, and he will see it as  tangential to the relational work of therapy.  But I have assignments to write, and I'm chasing Evan George's statement that 'our' work is to help people create future memories. I love that idea, future memories! That we step through past, future, present - to find the better in the past, to place instances of good memories into a functional sequence, coherent and believable and possible. Using memory is such ric...

As if I've stepped into in a spider's web. I dare not move... That which creates dizzying flights,  Desiring the moon... Will bring instead my Destruction. As a fox. I run! The hounds see movement. A flash of red. On fallen leaves, Darkens their teeth and matted fur  The awfulness of the last session. Frozen, and torn. Gives The death-blow to  Truth. He asks me - 'Two weeks ago. What happened?  Me -"My first thought is - is this a good idea going back to what happened? He is puzzled Me -"Why wouldn't it be a good idea - so the aim of this is what?" He says then we would find out what happened. I really, really do not think that this is a good idea! But he is going to do it! He begins to tell me why things were problematic for me! Me -"I need to stop you there. Things were not problematic for me, they were problematic for you. This is a problem for you.  Because I was in a situation that didn't make any sense to me. Suddenly I was in a situation...

It starts well, I feel that I'm talking to the person, not the role. He tells me his news, I join in. I am interested and sympathetic and ordinary. And I am aware that I'm in another one of the therapy forbidden zones; the place of 'chit chat'.  But it seems OK? And he instigated it? So what goes wrong? He is saying - not dramatically, but directly and uncompromisingly - 'a theme, it's becoming a theme...' And ' that I'd asked him to talk about my latest assignment - but we always get side-tracked' Did I? I didn't ask him about that assignment? I seriously doubt it... And now I'm panicking!  Because the real problem must be my feelings for him!  They have leaked out?  Is it obvious? IT IS OBVIOUS! He knows... OK, breathe! But under the surface... No! Do not try to imagine what is under the surface! STAY ON THE SURFACE! To answer his observation with the truth is impossible!  I feel talked at. I am being talked at. I'm never going to ...