What next?



And so I find myself marooned - to stay with the plane crash metaphor. I've just watched Society of the Snow. And as in the film, as in the awful reality of those real events, action must be taken. There will be no rescue otherwise, no getting out. 

So what action do I want to happen?

In counselling, and between counsellors, what counts as resolution is usually an apology of about a thousand words. Those words need to convey to the injured other, a real understanding of the harm done, and a heartfelt regret.

And how I manage to convey to Kit that this demonstration of awareness is appropriate and needed, I don't know. 

Yet.

Do I make a formal complaint?

The first option is to get in contact with the therapist and explain that there is a problem, and ask for some kind of resolution to be worked out.

If that isn't forthcoming, if the therapist doesn't acknowledge that there has been and still is a problem, then a complaint is justified.

A therapist who hasn't received a request for resolution from a client and is aware that there may well be a problem, is unlikely to get in touch. The jury is out on whether a therapist has a duty to get in touch with a client when there has been, what Gestalt practitioners call a rupture. A lot of therapists believe that once therapy is over then staying well away is the best option;  it is framed as maintaining boundaries, and preventing further upset.

But therapists who have experienced the unresolved rupture as clients themselves, tend to feel as I do. That if a therapist ignores the situation, the client is left - high the Andes - contemplating very uncomfortable choices, not quite as difficult as those made by the passengers of the Uruguayan Air Force Flight 571 - but for me, it is almost that abhorrent to complain.

This year blew in with the energy of The Avenging Angel - Nemesis. It is a paradox that I spend quite a lot of time exploring a client's anger and sense of injustice, with them; but I know I'm failing to do it for myself. 

I really don't want this feeling or energy.

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